Seedy Songs and Rotten Rhymes - the poetry of the playground

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hitler has only got one ball

Version 1:

Hitler has only got one ball
The other is in the Albert Hall
His mother,
The dirty bugger
Cut it off when he was small

Hitler has only got one ball
Hess has got no balls at all
Himmler had something similar
But poor old Goebbals
Had no balls at all

Repeat, ad nauseum

Version 2:

Hitler has only got one ball
The other is in the Albert Hall
His mother,
The dirty bugger
Cut it off when he was small

She put it, in a chestnut tree,
And farted it way out to sea,
Where the fishes,
Cleaned the dishes,
And had scollops,
And bollocks for tea

Repeat, ad nauseum

yet another version goes:

Hitler has only got one ball,
The other is on the Berlin Wall

(This was in the 1970s. A pleasing historical muddle)

Version 3:

Hitler has only got one ball
Joseph has two but very small
And Sambo, poor old Sambo
Has got no-oo ba-aalls at all
(Contributor's Note: "Sambo was the nickname of some kid whose surname was Samson, and not a racial slur at all")

* = Note - some versions substitute Tarzan for Hitler

For some reason people were still singing this in the 1980's!!

Version 4:

... a variation from Peter:

Hitler has only got one ball,
Goebbels has two but very small,
Himmler has something similar
But poor old Goering has nothing at all.

Version 5:

Geoff donated yet another variation:

Hitler has only got one ball,
Goering has two but very small,
Himmler has something similar
But poor old Goebbells has no balls at all.

Source: circa 1940's, UK (Wal.), US